Graced with a disability

 The worldly view on Autism is that it should be feared. We should do whatever we can to prevent it. Find and destroy the cause. The proper Christian view should be that Autism although a struggle was meant to be. God allowed it in individuals. Why? Well every time we ask that question it is the same answer. It is in His plan. It is meant for the Glory of God. How can such a thing be a good thing? We need a different prospective. It takes a lot to feel that a burden is actually a blessing. It takes some time to understand that God has a plan to make things better through struggles, tragedy and death. These things in of themselves are not good things. However, how God working through them can be good.
  I understand this is a tough pill to swallow. It was for me. Here I am with two special needs kids and every autoimmune disorder that I could get in my gene pool. I feel blessed in my struggles. I feel touched by God. I wake up knowing that I am closer to Him. I wake up in a lot of pain most days. Then I have to wake up my two kids that generally aren't easily woken up. However, I am happy. I have a purpose that was given to me. This happened the day my child was diagnosed with autism. I was just going along doing just enough. Then just enough wasn't good enough. I was forced into action because of this struggle place on my child and our family. Who I was is not who I am now.
   Every time we take a step toward God we become less of what we were and more of what we should be. When I complain about the struggles, worry and fear them I am stepping away from God. It becomes more of a burden. This is not useful. When I try and find something to blame other than sin itself that is not useful. Accepting the struggle for what it is and that in life you will have it. Than finding the good in it will always be a blessing. I can look at whatever my child age is now and still grieve a little at the things she can't do that a typical person her age can. However, I am overwhelmed by the climb that she has made in this life. My grief is short lived and turns into joy. We have as a family worked hard. We have gained so much for being a family that struggles. We don't even think about things that a typical family thinks about. It takes my husband and I quite a long time to come up with something we disagree with. We rarely fight each other. We communicate a hundred times better since we had special needs children. We have a need for each other that other married couples don't have as well. It makes us closer.
   It is almost the end of Autism awareness month and I can't help but be aware of the impact that it has on my life. My child certainly struggles with day to day things. I would bet that you wouldn't someone else that had as much joy. That got excited at life the way she does. The simple little things that she gets to do. She loves to cuddle, animals, sing and twirl. She is easily made happy and rarely upset. It is not something I fear because I live it. It is not something I want to get rid of because it is part of someone I hold dear. I don't need to find the cause because she is created in the image of God. If I am a Christian this is the only answer I need,
               John9:1-3 'As He passed by, He saw a blind man from birth. And His disciples asked Him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?"
            Jesus answered, "It was neither that this man sinned, not his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him"'