The weakest vessel

   When I look at an old car that is just not worth putting money in my advice is not to. However, I feel like I am that old car. Constantly having to be maintained. More and more things are going wrong. I have time and time again given up on this vessel. If were up to anybody less than Christ they would say it is not worth it. I certainly have felt that way and it is my own body! Christ, however, takes the weakest vessels making them into great ships!
    So many times we heard of stories of premies. This child is not going to make it. It is too weak. The doctor is 100% it will not survive. It not only survives but thrives. A child in the womb is not fairing very well again doctor says no way it will go full term. The parents have faith that it will survive against the doctors biding to not continue on with the pregnancy. They are rewarded with a healthy baby. Even in the tiniest of vessels Christ can be glorified.
    It is a scary diagnosis: Autism. You can get a wide range of answers from the professionals. It would be said they won't be able to talk, socialize, function as a normal human being. That was said of the likes of Temple Grandin. She now is a doctor in science and authored several books. Several people with autism can't talk but can sing better than most. Rather than talk some can communicate extremely well. A lot of the times we think of people with autism as very weak vessels. However, they handle a severe amount of workload. I look at my daughter in awe. Hoping than one day He will make me into half of what she is. She is a workhorse and keeps trucking.
   In my own experience I have been placed tasks in my life that I thought I could never accomplish. I have been through some pretty tough situations. I have a schedule that is overbearing. I keep adding to it. It isn't that it is not hard. It is very difficult. I get frustrated. I get mad. I can have a short fuse. I can also laugh about it later. I will compare myself to a boat now(I love things with engines). You see this boat out in the water it has holes all around the side of it. You're thinking: What is holding that boat up? Some scientific reason no doubt. The holes are placed just so that it can stay up. I am the boat. Plaster, wood, and other worldly things would certainly hold the boat up temporarily. What happens when more holes spring up and more. That is what happens in everyday life. I keep springing up a leak. I don't use worldly things to fill that hole. I depend on Christ's love to fill it. It is an eternal fix that is everlasting. I need a permanent fix.
    People ask me why I believe. It really isn't a decision I have made. I am the weakest vessel, who is still afloat. It is not of my own accord. It is a truth not a belief at that point.

Drink of it

    I have always enjoyed life. I have always for the most part been happy. I have always had a lot of suffering. I have had brutal migraines since I was 11. I mean in and out of ER, migraines. I have had knee trouble since before high school even. When things kept piling up I was all the more determined to live my life. However, it was out of anger I did so. I did it to beat the things that were causing my suffering. Looking back that mindset was silly.
   I still have quite a bit of struggles. I will for the rest of my life. It is now that I rejoice in them. It isn't that I love to suffer. I just have trust that Jesus Christ is all sufficient. That whatever path that my life takes it is one that He has already seen. He already knows the rocks, the bumps, even the smooth portions of that road. I could always say I took a wrong turn. I should of went down that path. Jesus is all sufficient, however. He isn't up there thinking"Oh, no she wasn't suppose to go that way". He knows every move I have made. He knows my every struggle, fear, doubt. and He knows this world.
   As a parent it is very difficult to think as Jesus as the all sufficient isn't it? It is easier to watch our childrens' every move. Make sure they get the best that this world has to offer. Wait?!? This world really doesn't offer much except the promise of suffering and death. If we depend on filtering what parts of the world our children are exposed to it will result in what?  Our children will have some suffering and they will have a physical death. This world was made for us by God. It is certainly a place of wonder. It, however, does not secure our children. It is the work of Christ that secures them. The all sufficient Christ.
  Obviously, I'm not going to take my kids skydiving anytime soon. We were put in place as a overseer of our children. It does not mean we go overboard on some of these things. As parents we go overboard quite often. We decide that something that is completely sufficient to eat is not good enough. We decide that they shouldn't play with certain things that don't harm anybody. We decide that the doctor just doesn't know what they are talking about. We worry too. Where is Christ in all of that?
  We have decided He is not sufficient enough. We have decided that our kids will only make it in this world because of us. We are sadly mistaken. I can't say what if I did something this way. Christ already had my life planned out. Just like He has my childrens' lives planned out. In their struggles He will do His work. Like He has done with my life. It is so hard for a parent to say "here is my child".
   We say the glass is half full or half empty. It really doesn't matter. God can make a drop seem like an ocean. While we stifle His all sufficient work on the cross we thirst. Let Him provide that ocean of water. Let Him be the all sufficient that He is suppose to be. Drink of it.